Read the room (before you sign the contract)

In an interview years ago, the interviewer explained that the role was vacant because the previous incumbent couldn't manage after she'd returned to work after having a child. Without batting an eyelid, he asked me whether I had children. I didn't pursue that "opportunity" further.

Inspired by this and other interview experiences over the years, I put a video out last week on job interview red flags. I described some things to listen out for when you're sitting across the table from a potential employer, trying to work out whether the role is as desirable as it says it is, or whether you're about to walk into something that will take years to recover from.

The comments keep coming.

Hundreds of them now, and I've read them all. People sharing stories of phrases they heard in interviews that they pushed to the back of their mind, told themselves they were overthinking it, and then spent the next two years paying the price. People who are now on long-term sick leave. People who have left the workforce entirely. People writing things like: "I wish I'd seen this before I took that job."

That's a lot of people carrying a lot of pain.

The phrases that came up again and again, in the video and in the comments, may be familiar to you too. "We're like a family here." "We need someone who can hit the ground running." "We wear many hats." And this classic: "We operate like a startup." Translation: we have no processes, the hours are chaotic, we'll call it culture to make it sound exciting, and then we might fold anyway, no matter how hard you work.

What struck me most, reading through everything, was how many people described common experiences. The feeling that something wasn't quite right. A pause that lasted a millisecond too long. An answer that didn't really answer the question. An interviewer who showed up late and didn't mention it. And then the internal conversation afterwards. Maybe I'm being too sensitive. Maybe it's nerves. Maybe I need the job too much to be picky right now.

Every single part of an interview process is information, even before you get to the interview itself. From the way colleagues treat the receptionist to whether the person interviewing you seems to know what the role actually involves. Can they or will they tell you what happened to the last person in the post? Do they flinch when you ask? The organisation is showing you, in real time, how it operates, how it treats people, what it values.

Many people shared the shift in mindset they experienced when they realised that an interview is not an audition where you perform your way to approval. It's a conversation between two parties who are both figuring out whether this is going to work. You're allowed to have opinions, to notice things, and to decide, even when you really want the job, that what you're seeing isn't what you need.

In a world of work where burnout is endemic and good people leave because the culture ground them down, it matters enormously that candidates walk in knowing they have the right to look around and ask themselves if this is the right place for them.

If you haven't watched the video yet, you can find it over on my YouTube channel. I've recently started turning my videos into written articles too, so you can find that one, and eventually all the others, here .

Work with me 🔗

If you're wondering whether coaching might help you think through where you are and where you're heading, I'd love to hear from you.

Express your interest here.

What am I reading? 📚

A lot of library books for my course! Finally got my Birmingham library card 😀

What am I watching? 👀

I'm planning a food forest in a section of our garden and ordered some fruit trees to plant later in the year: two apple, two plum and one greengage. Very exciting! This is the sort of thing.

What am I listening to?👂

Having supported Comic Relief's team on their Inclusivity and Representation strategies in the aftermath of the Stacey Dooley controversy in 2019, I was really interested to listen to this blog from brap about where their anti-racism work is now.

Joy-giving things 😍

I went to London for the day and enjoyed this amazing view!

Those grey clouds brought hail just minutes later though.

Have a lovely weekend

Lucy

ChangeOut is created by Lucy Caldicott. You can find more about my work at ChangeOut.org.

You can also find me on Instagram, and LinkedIn.

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